I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
