I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
