susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Randomize
