It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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