i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
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