Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Everyone says I win the strip club
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
