i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
