please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
