You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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