Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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