GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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