Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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