alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I need to stop coming to work sober
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Randomize
