If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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