Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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