the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
