She is in my trunk
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
