OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
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