I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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