She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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