was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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