Your tits are I can't wait for
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
