so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
