like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
