I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
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