he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize