can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
