I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
