like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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