Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
