I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
