I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
