So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Randomize
