Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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