Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize