So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
