if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
