What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
