Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
