Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
