The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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