Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
