i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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