why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
