All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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