Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
