is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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