I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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