I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
