I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
